Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in A(lex)is Luther's LiveJournal:

[ << Previous 20 ]

Friday, November 25th, 2005
5:48 pm	Bizarre. The other night I received a phone call from somebody I didn't expect... Marcus from Atlanta. He's the guy bella and I hung out with in Atlanta earlier this year when I went to go visit my dad for my birthday. And we kinda hooked up. I wasn't a whore about it. I hung out with him for 2 nights before I even kissed him...and even then, that's about all that went on. After I left he talked about how awesome i was and stuff, and we pretty much decided it wasn't something we'd be interesting in trying out (long distance). He was cool with it and just wanted to be friends. We've talked several times since, but the calls got fewer and further between...until the other night. Marcus is coming to Seattle for work for about a week and wants to hang out. um... I genuinely think he's a great guy. I'm pretty good judge of character, and so is Bella and she thought he was cool too. I'm very tempted to just chill with him...but it feels odd. He'll come across the US and hang out with me...just a little odd. But in the case of it his intentions are bad or anything, that can get scary. Also, if his intentions are good and one thing leads to another, I really don't want to be the SeattleAss. it as me a bit stressed. Whatever. I'm done thinking about it. Hope everyone's Thanksgiving was good. Mine was. Bella and I joined Nids and Nay, Javi, Justin (dreadyboy), Michelle and Kevin. It was nice. My dad also called me. It was good to hear from him. No word on the whereabouts of my mother. (Comment on this)
Friday, November 18th, 2005
7:04 pm	i started the new job monday. this whole week has pretty much getting me comfortable with my surroundings. i got the tour of the place. they were impressed that i knew the layout already, as i've been there several times. i tried to impress them even more and chatted up the neo-expressionism exhibit and Diego Rivera and the social realism pieces. i didn't want to sound pretentious though. i could go on and on about it, but sometimes find i just sound like an ass. I like it though. I had a really cool chat on one of my lunch breaks (tuesday i think) with this guy, Kirt, who is a tour guide. He just came over and started talking to me, which makes sense because tour guides are talkative. I'm NOT getting into that. I don't want to fall for another guy at work. I will force myself not to like him if I have to. So, speaking of other guys at work. I made Ryan cry my last night at work. Sounds horrible, I know. I was clocking out and a couple of the cool people I work with gathered around and gave me hugs and kisses and my boss said he'd miss me and all that sappy stuff...Ryan was standing toward the back of the room and when I hugged everyone, he kinda stepped up like he expected a hug. I looked at him and told him that he was a despicable excuse for a human being, and that I hope someone treats him as bad as he treated me and that he could just fall dead for all I'm concerned. He looked shocked. And got teary and walked away. I went back to Tasha and others and said bye and when I made my way to the door, Jose came out from the kitchen and gave me a hug and said bye and said "That bitch ryan is crying“. remind me to never cross you" and he laughed. I felt bad about it actually. I almost went and apologized. But I didn't. After i thought about it, i'm actually proud of myself. I'm tired of being treated like shit and being taken advantage of. It's time i stood up for myself--and all it took was 21 years of crap and 5 years of someone beating that in my head. Thanks! (Comment on this)
Sunday, November 13th, 2005
6:34 pm	Your Heart Is Blue Love is a doing word for you. You know it's love when you treat each other well. You are a giving lover, but you don't give too much. You expect something in return. Your flirting style: Friendly Your lucky first date: Lunch at an outdoor cafe Your dream lover: Is both generous and selfish What you bring to relationships: Loyalty What Color Heart Do You Have? Tomorrow my new job starts. I'm excited!!!! In an unrelated note, that i'll write about next time, I made Ryan cry my last night of work at the Cha-Cha Lounge. GASP. Wish me luck! (3 Comments |Comment on this)
Monday, November 7th, 2005
5:26 pm	With the upcoming new job fastly aproaching, there seems to be little time to do much else. I've gave my notice and my last night will be Thursday. I'll have the weekend, plus Friday off, and then the new job will kick in Monday. Exciting stuff. I'm going to pretty much just tell everyone bye my last night--except Ryan, I'll tell him to go fuck himself. Seriously, the more i think about him and the whole situation, the more it pisses me off. (for those not in the know, I work with Ryan and he expressed interest in hanging out with me a lot and he NEVER made a move despite all my signals...which i took as he's just nervous or whatever...i finally decided to make the move instead and he freaked out and said he didn't like me that way, he then went to work and preceeded to tell the whole staff about it, and when they made jokes and stuff he wouldn't stand up for me).That's what the Ryan thing is, and it's pissing me off. How fucked do you have to be to mess with someone like that? I understand hanging out with someone and not making a move for a while. But when you're making all the signals, and I'm returning all the signals, how can you not be interested? And then be that much of a pussy to tell everyone about it? That's so fucked up. Beyond fucked up. I guess I can't really talk about the whole flirtting but not being interested. All girls do it just to make themselves feel wanted. We did it this weekend. We had Javi and Fucking Dave invite over some of their friends and we chatted with them. Mostly because Bella seriously needs to get over the whole Gavin thing and because I haven't had a boyfriend since I moved here. It was decent. They were nice. Bella wasn't too social, so it ended up being me talking to them and trying to get her involved. By the end of the night we had found our niche and the guys were into us. We said bye and stuff and I think we both got kissed on our cheeks. It's cool to know that people out there can be interested in you. I really need a boyfriend. I haven't had one for a while, not since I got here. Ironically, the last two guys I messed around with were named Justin. I actually dated one of them for a while, but things happen and stuff, it's over now but i still really care for him. The other one was pretty much just a "get out of your slump" stuff. I needed affection and attention.Whatever, it happens. I'd so take a relationship over that though. Even a bad relationship. I just want companionship. (Comment on this)
Wednesday, November 2nd, 2005
5:07 pm	I'm so lame. I haven't updated in a million years, yet, I have so much to talk about. To conclude my last entry, the insurance company NEVER called back. I knew the lady didn't like me. Stupid old lady! But, the musseum I interviewed at a while back ago DID call me back. They are the ones that needed someone right away and pretty much promised me the job, only to find out that the girl wasn't going and that they DIDN'T need someone. So, yeah, they DID call. I went in for another interview. It went EXTREMLY well. The guy pretty much told me that I (AGAIN) had the job. It's not the initial job that I applied for, but i'll be the assistant to that job and preparing to fill in for her when she dies of the poison i slip in her drink...i mean...quits. The pay is great and it will actually be a career rather than a job. I think it's going to be fun. I start the 14th. OH MY GOD IT'S SO CLOSE!!! I'm so happy!!! I'm sure there was more that i ment to say, but it escapes me now. Sorry. Current Mood: cheerful (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Monday, October 10th, 2005
7:57 pm	Today was nice. I had a job interview at an insurrance comapany today. I'd be selling insurrance for people/musseum artwork. I don't think it went over so well. The lady I interviewed with was a total bitch. I think she thought I was going to be a lot older and when I showed up, barley into my 20's she almost died. She kept asking me the most retarded questions ever. Like stuff if my resume was up to date and if my references were good. And she kept throwing out little questions about the job, like I didn't know who they were. HELLO, I WAS AN ART HISTORY MAJOR, I THINK I KNOW WHO REMBRANDT WAS! Yeah, little digs like that annoyed me. I wouldn't be surprised at all if the job went to some 40 year old woman instead of me. Whatever. Work is still super lame, with all the super lame people. I seriously think they make it a point of trying to mess with me by shutting up when I enter a room. It's driving me insane. I can't wait for another job to come threw so I can make a scene and tell them all to fuck themselves. *sigh* I probably wont though. GOD, I'M LAME! (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Thursday, October 6th, 2005
10:11 pm	i'm so drunk right now. bella and me juts walked in on fucking dave and a very larg woman getting it on it smelt lik ass i dont want to sound mean, but ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww fucking dave could do way better i'm sure she's nice though (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Wednesday, September 28th, 2005
7:02 pm	Good to know that one other person out there knows how badly it sucks to have guys screw with your head. And I discovered he did infact tell people about it. Not just a couple people...almost EVERYONE knows. You know how I know other people know? Because last night after I clocked out and gathered my jacket and stuff and then a guy came up to me. He works in the kitchen and I've barely spoke to him before...anyway, he comes up to me and says, "So, Alexis, I was thinking maybe we could hang out and you can try and put the moves on ME!...and then I can reject you."--infront of everyone. And they laughed. What fuck-tards! I can't wait until I get a real job and out of that shithole. Things are still chaotic on the friensd front. I guess some head way was made, but not a whole lot. Can't we all just get along? (4 Comments |Comment on this)
Friday, September 23rd, 2005
11:17 am	It's been a month since my last update and not much has changed in my life. Well...kinda. I didn't ever think Ryan was ever going to make a move, so, stupid me, I decided to take matters into my own hands and make a move for the sake of us. Bad idea. He came over to my place and we watched a movie. We sat next to each other on the couch and half way threw the movie he put his hand on my knee (which he normally does) and his arm around me. The movie went off, I turned the tv off and we sat there for a bit. I made my move and leaned in for a kiss. I made contact and he pulled away. He gave me a shocked look and said he's sorry but he didn't think of me that way. I tried to justify my reasons of why I thought he was into me...but he shot them down. He said he'd probably better get going. Now I have to see him every night at work. I think he's told a couple people about it. Damn. So, I haven't been online a lot in the past month. Mainly because I use Bella's computer and i ran into an arguement with Gavin, who is usually here when i come to use the computer...but things are a changin. I don't think it's my place to gossip about things here...not that that's stopped me before. But yeah, I'm back here updating, enjoy it while it lasts. (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Wednesday, August 24th, 2005
6:18 pm	A lot has happened since my last update. Above my eyebrow is cut. It happened at the bar a while back. There was these guys that were asses and threw a glass at us and it shattered and cut me above the eybrow. I had to get stictches. It sucks. I hope it doesn't leave a scar. I didn't really want to go anywhere after it happened, it's kinda embarassing. I'm over it now. Whatever. So, the thing with Ryan and me is really weird. We've hung out a ton of times and he's yet to make a move. I don't understand why. One of the first couple nights we hung out he went for a kiss and missed due to me not paying attention and we laughed about it and I figured he'd try again..but he didn't. Another time I was pretty drunk and went to kiss him and missed, and then gave him a peck on the lips. But he hasn't made any moves at all. The other night we were sitting on my couch next to each other and I leaned my head over on his shoulder, you know, to kinda clue him in...he didn't get it. Then I started picking at his hand to, you know, make him try to hold my hand. Nope. Later in the night he did put his hand on my knee for a while and then moved down a little, but stopped like mid thigh...and there it stayed. I don't know if he's just not interested or what. I think I'd definetly feel like an ass if I went in for a kiss. Males should be the ones to do this. Females would just fuck it up. MAKE YOUR MOVE ALREADY! I'M WAITING!! (Comment on this)
Monday, August 8th, 2005
10:45 am	Hmmmm Friday night was actually really fun. Ryan took me to a resturaunt and it was really good. The conversation was really easy flowing. I really don't remember the last time I was on a date or with a guy where the conversation didn't lack or die down...well, Justin, but I've known him for a long time. After the dinner Ryan asked what I wanted to do...I suggested a movie, so we went and saw Wedding Crashers. I really enjoyed it. I thought it was going to be like American Pie-funny (dumb, crude humor) but it was actually really funny. At one point in the movie Ryan held my hand, and I looked at him out of the corner of my eye and saw that he was kinda looking to see my reaction. How funny. After the movie we walked around and then finally he took me home. I invited him up and we sat around a little bit and listened to music. Finally he had to go and he gave me a big hug and he went for a kiss, but for some reason I wasn't paying attention and he kissed me on the cheek. When that happened I looked up and he looked rather embarassed like, "oh, too soon for that huh". I apologized and said I wasn't paying attention, like a dork. I thought that was a good enough hint for him to try it again, but he didn't. He said he'd call me the next day and see if I wanted to do anything. The next day he didn't call until about 6-ish. After I had just about given up on him calling and made plans to make potato salad and join everyone at Nidia's for a bbq. He was rather chipper and asked what I was up to, when I told him I think it deflated his ego a little. But the great ego stroker I am, I invited him to hang with us. Everyone was there, minus Justin who had to work, and it was really fun. He seemed to get along with Gavin pretty well, and took Javier's teasing pretty well. Brilliant Bella came up with the idea to do shots of tequilla which we all did. I remember doing three, but Bella said we did more. So yeah, I got a little sloppy when I didn't intend to.I sat on the couch with Ryan most of the night, talking. No telling what I said. Later he called a cab and I walked him to the street to catch it and he went for a kiss good night and I lost my balance (stupid curb) and it was an awkward his bottom lip to my nostrils. We both laughed and then I gave him a peck on the lips and said bye. Suday we talked on the phone a little. Apparently the night before I told him that Bella said he was really cute and was thinking of a way to get him naked and in the pool. Embarassing...a little. So, today is Monday. I got here at Bella's about 40 minutes ago from the gym, Gavin was leaving for work and I got online. There's leftover meatloaf in the fridge that Gavin made...i've had two cold pieces. The gym makes me really hungry!! I can't help it. I eat like a boy after the gym. I suppose it won't do harm seeing as I burn enough calories at the gym that I can eat what I want and it won't be significantly over the amount i burnt. I should stay at the same weight, right? Or is that not how that works? (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Friday, August 5th, 2005
10:53 am	Went back to work Tuesday. Of course, Ryan was there and on our lunch break he wanted to talk. The outcome: I have a date Friday night....which is tonight (i meant to update this a couple days ago). This week has been a lot of hanging with Nidia and Nay...and Justin or Javier. Bella and Gavin seem to be making up for lost time. No answer at the apartment or the cell...oh well, atleast you can't die from too much sex. I worked out with Sebastian today. He suggested that I work on my shoulders. Is that a weird suggestion? I thought it was at first, but then he took me to the mirror and showed me. I have tiny shoulders. I'm self concious about them now. Sebastian is so cool. I sometimes wish things would have worked out...but too late for that, he's found a girlfriend. Her name is Kara. He talks about her a bit. I really enjoy working out with him...why can't it transfer over into the real world. (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Tuesday, August 2nd, 2005
11:46 am	I feel like an ass. A while back when I told a few (2) of my co-workers about not taking the job at the musseum, one of them told me that another co-worker, Ryan, was asking when my last day was and got nosey. This was because, according to her, Ryan wants to ask me out without the awkwardness of working together if I turn him down. I jokingly told her to tell him my last day was Friday...apparently she told him it was Friday. Well, having completley forgotten this, I took Friday night off, along with Monday--a 4 day weekend! I guess Ryan WAS really going to ask me out Friday (my ''last'' night), and when I didn't show up for work he assumed I had quit. And not being the best of friends other than at work, and knowing that we'd probably never see each other again...he got balls and asked Val for my number. Val didn't think it was weird and then gave him my number. So, Saturday night I get in from Bella's and there's a message on my machine. It's Ryan, pretty much saying, "Hey, It's Ryan......So, uh...you weren't at work Friday night, so I guess that was your last day working...so, I was just wondering if you'd like to hang out sometime. It's werid talking to a machine, so I'll call you back later. Bye" Fuck! He called back and I seriously thought about not answering it, but then I thought about how odd it would be come Tuesday night when I return. So, I answered it. He brought up the fact that I it was my last night and I corrected him about it, I told him about not taking the job....and he got very quiet. He then said, "Oh, well I guess I'll see you Tuesday then, right?" I said "Sure. We can talk about it in then if you like". He said "okay. bye" Wow. What an ass I am. (Comment on this)
Wednesday, July 27th, 2005
11:29 am	I've been having bad luck. Friday night coming home from work at 2 in the morning, my car decides to stop running and I had to pull over and stop. AT 2 IN THE MORNING!! I had to call and get it towed to my apartment and get a ride. It sucked so much. Sunday I told Justin and he's coming over today to look at it. I hope it's not something expensive. Last night at work was hectic. It was the busiest Tuesday I've ever seen. Like my first table of the night a kid spilt his drink 3 seconds after I sat it down. Yay for wet stomach. Then later in the night a football player came in with a girl and the manager started flipping out and ranting about stupid stuff. I felt sorry for the guy (the football player)because he was just trying to enjoy his time with the girl (maybe his sister or someone...i didn't see them kiss or anything)..but people kept coming up to him. Asking for autographs and stuff. How annoying. I couldn't be a public figure. I also had the most ANNOYING table ever. It started off regular. I came over to take orders and this kid who was about 12 was the most annoying ever.His parents didn't help matters at all either. Me: What can I get for you cutie? him: hmmmm...what is your name? me: Alexis, whats yours? him: Scott. Do people call you Alex? me: Some of my family does. But it's usually Lexis or Lex or Lexi to my friends. him: Well, Lexi, what do you recommend I get? me: Hmmmm...I really enjoy the salmon. him: I think I'll get that. Thanks a lot cutie. me: Anytime. Pretty annoying huh? he was just getting started. When I came back to see how they were doing... Me: How's everyone doing? him: Good...now that you're here me: *to his parents* Wow, you guys have a little romeo on your hands his dad: yeah, he gets that from me me: how many girlfriends to you have, scott? him: about 7, but I'd give them all up for you me: awwww, how sweet him: *to his dad* good one, huh? him : *to me* so, do you have a number? me: i do...but I don't usually give it out to players such as yourself him: come on, you can make one exception me: i don't know. maybe when i come back with your food him: i'll be waiting I bring everyone their food... him: this looks devine, great recommendation, Lexi me: I do my best him: So...can I get your number me: I don't know. How do your parents feel about you dating an older woman? his dad: I think it'd be good for him. he's very mature his mom: Yeah, I think you two would make an excellent couple. Grandma would like her him: see? me: hmmmm, we'll see. i don't just give my number out to anyone him: alright! me: i've got to get back to work, enjoy your salmon him: oh, i will! I had to come back to see how they were doing.... him: my dad says you have a nice butt me: .... his dad and mom: HAHAHAHAH!! him: i agree but i like your boobs his mom and dad: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAAHAHAH!! me: ...looks like everyone is fine *leaves* At this point i tried to switch tables but nobody agreed... him: so can i get your number now? me: i don't know, i usually don't date guys who have such a potty mouth him: ....i'm sorry! me: i dunnooooo him: i'll be nice, my dad told me to say that his mom and dad (who by this time were smashed): HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAhAHAHaHaH! me: I'm sorry, i don't think we'd work out his: At least I didn't ask the other thing they said to ask....if you put out on the first date mom and dad: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!! me: here's your check *leaves* Oh my god, at first I thought it was just the kid that was annoying, but then i realized it was his parents egging him on. Drunk parents at that. I feel sorry for the poor kid. Geez, what horrible parents. (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Monday, July 25th, 2005
11:09 am	I don't have much to updated about...but I'm really bored. .......................... .......................... .......................... .......................... .......................... In a confession of sorts...Justin and I messed around Saturday night. I know, I know. Nothing will come out of it. Just like a lapse in judgment. I kinda regret it now, just because I'm thinking "Hmmmm, if we are both up for it, I don't see why we couldn't do this on a regular basis". I'm such a whore. Good news is it wasn't awkward at all. Before, during or after. I guess that's a good thing then, right? Never thought I'd do that...I don't know whether to be dissapointed in myself that I did it...or proud of myself for thinking about myself for once (he didn't seem to have any problem with it either) Then on Sunday my mom calls me out of nowhere, she's been staying at my aunts (who thinks she can control and regulate what my mom is doing at all times). Telling me that she really wants to see me. There's something she really needs to tell me. Come alone. It's really important. So, I head over and...SHOCKER, my aunt isn't there and my mom is SMASHED! I no longer stepped foot in the door way and had to hear, "GET OUT OF HERE!!! GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE!!" So I left. No need to stay and argue, right? I could care less what she had to say. Is that wrong of me? (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Wednesday, July 20th, 2005
11:09 am	I stole this survey from slanteyed, stole it as well. Name 12 people you know 1. Renee 2. Nidia 3. Michelle 4. Kevin 5. Javier 6. Gabby 7. Justin 8. Meranda 9. Ryan 10. Gina 11. Dave 12. Josh If #1 asked you to make-out with them, would you?: ...She IS really good looking... If #12 needed a kidney, would you give them your kidney?: I hate to say it, but probably not. I barely know him. Does #7 know CPR?: Probably. He knows a lot of stuff. Is #2 going out with anyone?:   Renee (#1) How cute is #4?: Very. In a brainy, quiet way. Does sugar have a bad effect on #5?: Yes! What is #8’s favorite color?: I'd say red. She wears a lot of it. What would you label #12?: A very good friend of very good friends of mine, who just started to be social with us. Have you ever been on a date with #11?: Not a date-date. But we've went out for lunch before. Does #9 enjoy drawing?: I only see him at work, so, I'm not sure. Have you ever been on a date with #3?: Not a date-date. Can #6 be a little crazy?: VERY. What is #2’s favorite food?: Chili Verde What would you do if #3 turned out to be your biological sister/brother?: I'd be happy I had a sister. I'd hope she would do the same. Does #5 have any pets?: No How many houses has #1 lived in?: 2 Actual houses, I'm guessing How did you meet #4?: He's going out with Michelle, whom is best friends with Nidia and Gabby What is #7’s favorite TV show?: The Daily Show with Jon Stewart??? Is #8 older or younger than you?: Older Have #1 & #10 ever went out on a date?: Probably not Give #9 a hug?: Sure What is your relationship with #10?: I work with her. We've hung out occasionally. Who on this list is most likely to marry #11?: Meranda What if your mom/dad remarried #12?: What the fuck kind of question is that?!?!?! Are #1 & #2 a lot alike?: A lot alike! So many common interests (like eachother). Nay is a bit quieter. What hair color does #3 have?: A sandy blondish brown. What is #4’s favorite food?: Haven't a clue Could #5 have secret admirers?: He's pretty good with the ladies, I'm sure there are a few. Have you ever ridden in a car when #6 was driving?:  She's asian, I'm not STUPID!!---actually only a few times. Can you picture #7 being old?: Yes. He'd be all hardcore old person. Lots of wrinkly tattoos, and a big santa beard and in black. How cool. How is #8’s cooking skills?: Really good actually! Is #9 older or younger than you?: The same age...I'm going out on a limb and saying he's a February baby, so, OLDER! Would you ever make-out with #10?: Not if we were both sober What is a random fact about #11?: He thinks it's the funniest thing in the world that he has a big penis and small nuts...and he shows it often Have you ever been to #12’s house?: Nope</span> (Comment on this)
Tuesday, July 19th, 2005
11:32 am	So Friday night I had to go to work and I was STILL pissy about the musseum thing. I assume I wasn't the friendliest to the customers, but I don't recall. Half way threw my shift Gina pulled me aside and asked me when my last day was before I went to the musseum job. I took Sasha's advice and said "Oh, I decided not to take it...personal problems with someone I'd be working with". She turned pink and said "Oh....hahaha" and I felt like an ass. I said "what? why?" and she said "Brian, wanted me to know so he could ask you out...and if you turned him down he wouldn't have to work with you and be embarassed". HOW CUTE!! I told her to tell him my last day was next Friday. I'm so mean. But atleast I'll get a free dinner out of it ;) He's actually really nice and I've had a little bit of a tiiiiiny little crush on him. Whatever though, we shall see if he asks or not. Saturday night I was off and we all headed to Nids'.Bella, Nids, Nay, Shell, Kevin, Javier, Justin and Myself. It wasn't at all awkward, just as I suspected. We laughed and played pool and then swam. I had a little wardrobe malfunction, which sucked. Never buying a bikini from Wal-Mart again!! The fucker just snapped behind my neck and fell around my feet. Shitty 10year old Korean manufacturers!! That's about it for the weekend update. So far this week nothing worth mentioning. When bella finishes the new Harry Potter, she's lending it to me. I'm excited...and too lazy to buy my own copy apparently. (Comment on this)
Friday, July 15th, 2005
12:25 pm	The musseum actually just called. Yeah, Looks like i won't be getting the position after all. They gave some lame excuse. It really really fucking sucks. I'm so pissed. Good thing i haven't given my two weeks notice yet, huh? But i told my co-workers about it...i'm an ass. i'm chatting online right now, and it's taking everything i have not to just blow up. i think i better go now. (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Thursday, July 14th, 2005
11:58 am	Dear Journal, Monday night after work I came home and after sitting down for about 3 minutes, Justin called. He wanted to talk about some things...which is odd, because I was going to call him the next day (or later that day, seeing how it was 2 am) and talk to him about somethings. Strangely, his concerns where my own concerns. We talked quite a bit about this and by the end of the call, not much had been decided, other than we both didn't think it would work for much longer and that we want to preserve our friendship. And that he'd come over tomorrow to talk more. The next day he did come over and we talked more of the same. So, the conclusion? We've pretty much decided that it would be in our best interest to end things before they got too weird and attached and all that stuff, so that we could keep the friend thing. Honestly...I'm quite glad he say things that way too. At the risk of just sounding like a complete whore, I'll call it what it was, it was a rebound relationship. Even if my last relationship hadn't been for over a year and half, that's what it was. He was a guy who I really liked(friend-wise), thought was really good looking, and seemed interested in me. He was there to get me over all my hang ups about relationships. He was there to give me extra confidence when I had zero. He was there to show me that all guys are not fuck-heads. He was there for great sex when I needed it (and honestly, I didn need it). And from his point of view? Pretty much all the stuff I put down. Other than he kinda knew that it was what it was and that he didn't want to take it to the next level because of that. But, persistent me, begged. Okay, I didn't beg...but I might as well have. I initiated everything.......and honestly can any guy resist a girl you think is pretty who is groping you, and taking off her clothes? I didn't think so. So it was what it was. I still really enjoy him. And I don't think this weekend will be awkward at all when we go to Nids' and hang out. That's it. I guess I can take potential boyfriend applications again. LOL. PS. In my 23 years of living, I've never experienced break-up sex. The main reasons being I haven't had many relationships, and that they always seem to end harshly and the opportunity for break-up sex isn't there...or I'm in NO WAY interested in it...... ..... But man, have I been missing out!!! Sincerely, Alexis E. (giant whore) Current Mood: cheerful (Comment on this)
Thursday, July 7th, 2005
1:01 pm	The fourth was tons of fun. We all ended up at at Nidia's. For some reason I wasn't in the mood to get shit faced, so I stuck to water and Snapple. Bella also didn't drink. It was tons of fun. One point worth mentioning is a sober Bella trying to push Javier into the pool. She failed, seeing as he has about 120lbs on her. But then he turned around and grabbed her by the arm and just flung her into the pool like she weighed 5lbs. It was hillarious. She followed up with splashing, which got him soaked and then Nidia ambushed him and they both went in the pool. Great stuff. Dear Bella's boy left for Chicago yesterday. She seems really bummed. She mentioned things like "what if he finds someone while he's there. a month is a looooong time"...and..."what if he just decides he doesn't like me. he just decides he likes being alone or with someone else better"...At first I thought she was joking, but in talking to her last night after i got off work, she seems seriously worried. I honestly don't think gavin would be the type of guy to just find a random girl in chicago and fuck her...let alone meet a girl and decide he likes her better than bella. Nor do i think he would break up with her out of the blue. he seems genuinley happy with her. i think she's just worrying too much--you know because she LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOVES him. That's right, I said it even if you won't. You LOVE him. It's so apparent. You gush about him constantly and I've seen the way you're whole demeanor changes when he enters the room. You are utterly and hopelessly in LOVE with him. And everyone knows it! Anywhoooo, I am currently enjoying the situation with Justin. I hate to say it, but I'm not sure if I (we) see it working out as a long term thing. I think we just really like each other and have a mutral attraction toward each other. But it is fun just getting to know him better. He's a great guy, and any girl would be beyond lucky to have him. We've talked about it and I have a decent history of staying friends with ex's (as in continuing talking occasionally, i think i would do better with how this is, us having the same group of friends) and he's said he would really like to keep being friends for a very long time. i'm a little hesitant to take it much further...as if you can go much further...just because if (when) it doesn't work out we won't be all hating each other. but in the mean time, the sex is awesome...and is he ever great with his hands! :P just kidding (1 Comment |Comment on this)